El Pollo del Diablo (Or how to use a whole bottle of sriracha...)

Hey there lovely Butterballs!
My, what a lot of time we're spending together lately!  Also, thanks a bunch for reading!  My views have almost doubled in the last month or so! 

Butters, Matt and I have been doing an obscene amount of entertaining lately.  I realized just how many people have been coming and going when I went to fill the dishwasher this evening, and there were 23 cups of different varieties, and 2 plates.  This might also speak to what kind of entertaining we've been doing, but this is a family show. 

As you know, Pecker has been here for the week, and just departed this morning.  Upon her arrival last Saturday, I wanted to make something super special.  Our typical go-to for grilling is bratwurst.  You could blame our time in Austria for this, but really it's because they take little to no effort and you can eat a lot of them before you're full (or maybe that's just me...).  I put chicken legs on Matt's shopping list, but nothing else.  Then I decided I'd make a tasty marinade!  But with what?  SOOOOO MUCH SRIRACHA. 

Earlier this summer, I planted an herb garden in our former BBQ that I've painted purple and yellow.  It's life as a BBQ ended tragically short when some holes rusted through the bottom, and hot coals would fall out the bottom onto the sidewalk.  In between being a BBQ and an herb garden, it sat in the rain for a while and got all rusty.  Apparently this is the perfect storm for growing crap, because my herbs are HUMONGOUS.  Particularly my parsley.  It's almost as big as Butters, and you know that's saying something.  So my next step was to chop a lot of parsley.  My lovely pal Guido went to Albertson's to fetch me some lime juice since we didn't have a speck of citrus in the house.

To make my chicken leg marinade you will need:
Roughly 3/4 cup sriracha (Yep.  You can use more or less depending on how spicy of a product you want.  Our end product was a little more than medium spicy.)
The juice of 3 limes (or about a 1/4 cup of pre-squeezed)
1/2 cup oaky white wine
1/2 cup olive oil
5 shakes tabasco
1 tsp. smoked paprika
1/2 - 1 tsp of chili flakes
1 tbsp chopped garlic
1/3 cup finely chopped fresh parsley (normally I'm all about substitutions, but the fresh parsley is an important step for texture...)
kosher salt and cracked black pepper to taste

Whisk it all up, and reserve half of the mixture to baste your chicken with as you grill it.  It should look like this:

Let your chicken soak in the remaining mixture at least an hour, turning frequently.  Keep the raw meat in the fridge.  Read: SALMONELLA.  Make sure it stays cold until cooking!  Once you've started to cook your meat, don't cross contaminate your different containers of marinade.  Do not use the bowl that had the chicken in it to baste your cooking chicken.  I like to use a charcoal grill.  There's absolutely nothing wrong with gas, I just like the smokey taste that the charcoal gives whatever you're cooking.  Baste your legs as you turn them, making sure to get some of the parsley on all sides (this gives them an herby crunch once the herbs dry from cooking).  Cook until juices run clear, the meat should stay fairly juicy since you'll be basting it continually.  They should look like this! 

If you have some marinade left that hasn't been exposed to raw meat, you can serve it on the side for a saucier experience!  You could use any cut of poultry or pork with this marinade.  Enjoy, apparently it makes you have big cheesy grins!

Happy cooking, Butterballs!  Don't forget to like, share and follow, and most importantly, cook! 

Watermelon Balsamic Popsicles (plus how to make your kitchen super sticky...)

Howdy all, Butterballs!
Happy belated 4th of July!  I hope you blew a lot of stuff up and ate an unreasonable amount of grilled food!  I certainly consumed more than my fair share of polish sausage.  We aren't allowed to blow anything up in Missoula this year (though several of my neighbors did anyway...), so we settled for grilling a lot of different meats.

As many of you might know, my very best Pecker is in town for the week.  She hails from Seattle currently, and apparently it's pretty nice there his time of year.  She got here just in time for he temperature to rise 20 degrees, so it's been hanging out in the mid to high nineties the majority of the week.  We decided on Wednesday that we were way more into making something cold than something hot for dinner, so we blended up these balsamic and watermelon Popsicles/granita.  We also had salad, because that also does not require the gas range being lit.

Now, keep in mind that the heat had whipped us into anincredible delirium at this point, so this quickly turned from routine blending and chopping into us putting on voices and pretending to be the judges on Chopped.  Megan was Ted Allen, who in turn narrated all of their witty banter.

Ted Allen:  For all our viewers at home it looks like the challenger's basket is literally filled with watermelon and nothing else.

Alex Guarneschelli:  Well Ted, it's a good thing she has a lime in her pocket.  Also, any good chef knows it's beyond important to carry around your own balsamic vinegar.

Arron Sanchez:  I'm hoping she puts a little Latin flair in there somewhere, I hear Cacique Queso Fresco adds the perfect touch to watermelon.

Alex:  Shut up Arron.

Ted:  It looks like she's starting to break down that enormous watermelon.

Alex:  Those chunks are going to be far too big to eat.

Amanda Freitag:  I'm just wondering if she's thought to add an acidic element of some kind.

Alex:  Shut up Amanda, that it WAY too big to eat.

Geoffrey Zakarian:  When I cut up watermelon I use a Peruvian fish boning knife.  It's much more efficient than traditional fruit cutting methods.

Ted:  It looks like she's getting out the blender.

Alex:  That watermelon will NEVER fit in that blender.

Ted:  Now she's headed for the produce pantry!

Scott Connant:  If she comes back with a raw red onion I'm going to kill myself.

Ted:  Some herbs I think, is it mint?

Amanda:  Sugary fruit really needs an herbascious element to balance the sweetness.

Alex:  Shut up Amanda.  Her sue chef, Pecker is chopping that mint WAY TOO BIG!

Scott:  As long as it's not a red onion I don't care.

Alex:  Shut up Scott.

Scott:  Shut up Alex.

Ted:  Back on the floor our challenger seems to have abandoned the blender for the food processor.

Alex:  Told you it was too big.

Ted:  She's adding balsamic vinegar and red wine to her mint and watermelon mixture.

Amanda:  I'm still waiting for some acid.

Ted:  Aren't we all, Amanda.  Oh, she's blending in some lime.

Amanda:  Thank God.

Arron:  If she really wanted to pep it up she should consider some Cacique Queso Fresco.

Alex:  Shut UP Arron!  If you have to sell your ugly face to some cut rate Tex Mex cheese that advertises on daytime television you'll never make it as a real chef.

Ted:  Looks like she's headed to the blast chiller with that mixture!

Alex:  She licked some juice off of her finger.  I'm not eating that.

To make mine and Meggy's watermelon Popsicles/granita you will need:
Half of a giant, seedless watermelon, roughly chopped
A half cup of fresh mint leaves, roughly chopped
A half cup of balsamic vinegar
A half cup of red wine
Juice of two limes

Blend all of it up, and freeze in any form you like.  We chose Popsicles and a big Tupperware container.

Stay cool Butterballs, and as always, love and best fishes!