Mama Katie's Smokin' Salmon!

Butterballs, Butterballs!  Where have you been all my life?  Apologies for my prolonged absence, but never fear! I come bearing piles of delightful recipes.  Dexter, Butters, Matt and I have been spending our days working, building patios (more on that later...), and cooking up a lot of tasty treats.  One of which, my smoked salmon, has become a family favorite, and has been affectionately named 'Mama Katie's Smokin' Salmon' by my ever-adorable husband.

Deep in the heart of darkness that was spring this year, the fur babies and I were itching for an opportunity to get outside.  We strapped on our yoga pants, hitched up our Ugg boots, and decided to try our hand at smoking fish.  "Smoking fish?", you might ask, "but why?"  Yes, you can most certainly purchase a nicely pre-smoked salmon at the grocery store, but having done a little research, a four ounce piece of smoked salmon averages $8 (or $32 a pound...), at least in the greater Missoula area.  If that doesn't convince you, just consider that this is an activity where you literally NEED to sit on your ass, drink a beer, and read a book for a minimum of 2 hours to do it successfully.  So, let's do some math: 

Butters has decided to make some home-smoked salmon.  He goes to the cat grocery store and spends $25 on a whole side of raw salmon, that will yield 8, 4 ounce pieces of smoked salmon (roughly $12.50 per lb.). Last week, Butters had a party for all of his cat friends.  Dexter served them store bought salmon at $32 per lb.  How much cat nip beer can Butters buy with the money he's saving to drink while he smokes his fish?  Do you have your answer?  A LOT of cat nip beers, that's how many.  Essentially, while this process is somewhat time consuming, it will give you the gift of  cost effective, cured meat, with the added bonus of productive leisure time.  Win, win I say.

Now, to make some fancy, hard-smoked salmon, you will need some non-edible supplies:

• Grill- I like my charcoal one for this process.  If you decide to use a gas grill, you won't need the next two items.
• Charcoal (about 5 lbs)
• Lighter Fluid
• Wood chips for smoking (I like hickory) Note:  If you use a gas grill, you will need a smoker box for your chips.
• Large bowl
• Strainer
• Cookie sheet with sides

Before you get started:
You'll want to hang out with your fish to make sure that your charcoal fire stays stoked and covered in chips.  Cooking anything in a smoker has a distinct odor, so maybe don't wear your favorite dry clean only ballgown for this process.

First, you'll need to soak your wood chips.  The longer you smoke them, the less chips you'll need because they will last longer.  Fill your strainer with chips, place it in the bowl.  Fill the bowl with water.  Leave to soak for a minimum of 1 hour.

After you get you chips soaking, you'll need to prep your salmon.  One of the major pros of smoking your own salmon is that you can choose your own seasonings.  I like onion and garlic powder with cracked pepper, but I also have a Trader Joe's lemon pepper grinder I'm itching to try out.  Some people like to play with glazes (think balsamic vinegar and marmalade...), the possibilities are truly endless.  You will need to clear a flat space in your fridge to let your salmon rest.  It will lose lots of liquid, so choose a cookie sheet with sides so your fridge doesn't smell like fish for the foreseeable future. 

Edible Ingredients:
As much salmon as you'd like to smoke- I used 2 lbs. cut into 8ish pieces, leaving the skin on
1 cup kosher salt
1 cup brown sugar
1 1/2 tbsp. each cracked black pepper, onion powder, and garlic powder

Mix dry ingredients together, move a little seasoning into a different bowl as you use it, so you don't contaminate your extra seasoning with fish yuck.  Cover all pink sides of the salmon with a thick layer of seasoning.  Place each piece on a cookie sheet, covered in parchment paper.  Place in the fridge for a minimum of one hour (the longer you let the salmon set, the dryer the finish on it will be).

While you are waiting for your salmon to get dry and your chips to get wet, light your charcoal grill.  Keep the coals in a pile in the front of the grill, where they can get lots of air.  Cover in lighter fluid, and let burn until the edges have started to turn gray. 

Take your salmon out of the fridge.  There should be lots of liquid in the bottom of the cookie sheet.  Wipe each piece off with wet paper towel.  You can leave as much seasoning on the fish as you'd like, but if you leave it all it will be too salty. 

Cover your coals with about 2 handfuls of your wood chips (strain first).  Place your fish on a part of the grill with NO COALS under it, leaving a little space between each piece.  Put the lid down on the grill, and open the vents halfway.  The longer you smoke it the dryer it will be.  2 hours, adding new chips whenever the old ones have completely turned black will make a flaky, moist fish.  Your fish should be a deep red color when you take it off the grill.  Keep it on foil until it cools. 

Serving Suggestions!

Now that you have all of this delicious fish, how do you eat it?  Here are a few of my favorites!

• With a soft cheese (plain goat cheese, or Boursin) on crackers, or a crusty baguette.
• In a sandwich!  Goat cheese, bean sprouts, cucumbers, and red onion on ciabatta.
• On a salad!  Baby greens with sesame sticks, mandarin orange slices, cucumber and a balsamic vinaigrette.
• By itself!  Great with olives, cheeses, and other cured meats like sopressata.
• On a Bagel!  Cream cheese, red onion, and capers, oh my!
• On toasts!  Goat cheese, dijon mustard and capers!  
• In your pasta!  I like it with pesto (see Pork and Pesto for Your Mama! Entry for a pesto recipe!!)
• With quinoa!  Boil the quinoa with garlic and shallots in chicken stock.
• Show it off at parties!  Friends love friends who smoke their own fish!  There's a certain Ron Swanson-esque, je ne sais quoi about a buddy who makes artisanal meats.  
• Smoked salmon dip!  1 lb cream cheese, a little milk, some worcestshire sauce, dill and dijon mustard blended with 4 ounces of your salmon.

Voila!  You can keep your fish in the fridge for a couple of weeks, or the freezer for up to a year.  See?  Wasn't that worth the wait?  Now, put on your bikini, crack open a cold one, and head out to the yard for some quality fish smoking time!

Love and best fishes,
Katie

-41 with the Wind Chill Means Hot and Sour Soup, Y'all!!!

Butterballs, butterballs,
The forecast today calls for a major wind chill warning, and I quote, "Long term exposure can result in hypothermia, frost bite, or DEATH."  Cheery, no?  That last part is my favorite.  What that means for us is no time outside, and my tolerance for getting in and out of the car is at an all time low.  THAT means, I had to get gas for carpool, so that used up my "getting out of the car" quotient for the day, so that means, Refrigerator Roulette!  Here's a rough summary of Matt and my week night thought process:

Matt: The new Bon Appetit came yesterday!

Katie: Oooooooo, what's on the cover?

Matt:  Fancy chicken and dumplings!  With mushrooms!

Katie:  Oohhhhh, we have mushrooms!

Matt:  We could make this!

Katie:  Okay, I'll thaw some chicken!

Matt:......reading

Katie:  *Googling hot and sour soup because the cover photo looked more like hot and sour soup than chicken and dumplings*

Matt:  This takes two and a half hours and you have to own a pressure cooker.  Also what's a morel?

Katie:  That's okay, I'm already making hot and sour soup!  Also, I'm not thawing chicken, because I will probably eat all the left over pizza while our shitty microwave takes ten hours to thaw all the chicken. 

So the long and the short of it is that we made hot and sour soup with left over breakfast sausage. 

Hot and sour soup is something that you only buy the morning after one too many 7 and 7's in a Chinese restaurant (you can infer the kind of Chinese restaurant by the fact that this story takes place in the morning...), and you only have $15 in your bank account (i.e. college).  It is full of meat, egg, mushrooms, and grease, and can usually be purchased in near-gallon-drum quantities for a little less than dirt cheap.  While this does not aptly describe our circumstances this evening, since we haven't been 21 now for several years (read: I drink a glass of wine, make some sort of creation for dinner, and fall asleep watching Dr. Quinn in bed at 9 p.m. nearly every day), and we have to get up in the morning for silly things like work, and feeding the fur babies, and drinking coffee, this turned out particularly well.   I also didn't use any of the recipes I found, since most of them required things like tofu, so here's how to make my faux hot and sour soup!

To make my week night savior Hot and Sour Soup you will need:
 1/2 pound shitake mushrooms sliced
6 mini bell peppers, for color, sliced in little rings
1 head broccoli, chopped 
1 small onion halved and sliced
1 tablespoon minced garlic
3 green onions, chopped
a few tablespoons olive oil
3/4 lb. browned sausage (or any kind of protein, chicken or pork would also be great, Matt usually doesn't define a dish as dinner unless it contains animal)
4 eggs, lightly whisked
2 cans (4 cups) Chicken stock
2 cups water
1/2 cup white wine
5 tbsp corn starch
3 tbsp sriracha
1 tsp chili flakes, or to taste
1/4 cup white vinegar
3 tbsp. soy sauce (I always use low sodium)

Brown the onion, garlic, broccoli, mushrooms and peppers in olive oil in a large stock pot.  Add in the sausage, stock, water, wine, sriracha, chili flake, soy sauce, and vinegar.  Bring to a boil, add in the corn starch, simmer for 15 minutes to thicken.  Bring the heat down to medium, drizzle the egg into the hot soup, stir lightly.  Stir in the green onion.  Serve with egg rolls (which I did not, in fact, have.  If it were payday, I would serve this with egg rolls...).  Although the picture might suggest otherwise, you should not share this with the furry children.  Unless you are fond of cleaning spicy, spicy carpet stains. 

Enjoy, because it's mighty cold out there, friends.  Remember, don't prolongedly expose yourself, because of that whole "death" thing.  Really it makes far more sense to make yourself some soup and drink a glass of whatever.  As always, love and best fishes!

Aye Carumba! Protein explosion Mexi-Casserole!

Howdy y'all, Butterballs!

Holy page views, Batman!  Thanks for the love!  You inspire me to continue, and share the love that is the Raffety family kitchen!  I am also inspired by the fact that Matt is insisting on cooking this evening (twist my arm...), and that I stocked up on a WHOLE bunch of Oak Leaf Cabernet at Walmart the other day.  Fun fact: Did you know that the Two Buck (or closer to 3 bucks anymore...) Chuck people make Oak Leaf ($3.77, but still an acceptable level of cheap for the professionals among us...)?  This is mostly a "fun" fact because Charles Shaw is a completely legit, weeknight wine, so buying 8-10 bottles of Oak Leaf on payday is 100% socially acceptable, and maybe you can pass as a connoisseur having a cost-effective party instead of just tired and cheap and probably drinking this in the company of your cat.  At our local Walmart, they've also started wrapping each individual bottle of wine in a wine shaped paper bag.  For those of us that need to haul 10 bottles out to where we parked our car for carpool going on 12 hours ago, this is clearly a very considerate gesture. 

In Missoula at the moment, it is capital W Winter, with all caps SNOW.  Matt and I are the owners of the world's most useless snow shovel.  It is so useless, that if it snows, I am far more likely to choose to use our broom (formerly known as house broom), to SWEEP AWAY all 8 inches of snow than I am to use this shovel.  Matt recently informed me that "it works way better" if you flip it over, and shovel upside down.  Our neighbors already think that we are completely inept 12 year olds (in fact most 12 year olds are probably intelligent enough to abandon a shovel this useless...), so making a show of shoveling upside down would only further cement this perception into their minds.  Long story short, I moved all of our snow off of our hard outdoor surfaces today using an O'Cedar floor broom, then cursed and swore at our shovel, all while still in my dress from taking our 4th graders to the orchestra today (obviously this seems counter-intuitive... don't worry, I changed my shoes).

After you've already had your fill of shoulder toning shoveling, and your dog's belly is two inches below the surface of the snow, making a good walk somewhat of a moot point, what you really need is more protein than a professional body builder consumes in a week.  I have a history of intolerance for Mexican-themed pasta... I can't rationalize it per se, maybe it's my love of pasta combined with mozzarella, who knows?  I scan Pinterest and see a plethora of recipes for lasagna rolls smothered in enchilada sauce and think... well, no thanks.  You could use orzo, or another small pasta as a substitute for the quinoa, because... variety is the spice of life?  Sure.  I just always feel like quinoa is rice's exotic Spanish cousin, and casserole is pasta's cozy Italian bestie, so naturally the two should meet.  Lord knows I love me some CHEESY, CHEEESSSSYYYY casserole.

You will need:
1 and 3/4 to 2 cups uncooked quinoa (you can boil this in equal parts water til all the water absorbs)
2 chicken breasts, seasoned with taco seasoning (another weeknight shortcut, you can sub your own blend, cumin, garlic and salt are most important), cooked through and cubed
1 medium can tomatoes, chilies and onions mixed
1 medium onion, coarsely chopped and browned in olive oil
1 can black beans, drained
1 cup (or more, YOLO, right?  P.S. This is the correct use of YOLO, or "You Only Live Once", as opposed to, "Drank 12 Four Locos and lit my porch on fire today... made s'mores, YOLOOOO!!!) Mexican blend cheese
Parley
Taco Seasoning
Pepper
Chili Flakes (to taste, 'mo spicey, 'mo betta in my book...)
One swirl of Sriracha (because why not?) all around the pan (of course that's a measurement, who asked you?)

Once you've boiled the quinoa and cooked the chicken and onion, you can mix up all the ingredients, minus the cheese in a large pan.  Heat until most of the tomato juice has reduced.  Spoon into medium, round baking dish, cover with cheese, and bake at 375 degrees for 30 minutes, or until cheese starts to bubble and brown slightly.  Serve with guacamole, see http://cookingwithbutters.blogspot.com/2011/10/hooray-for-fiber.html for my recipe!  Matt also likes a dollop of sour cream.

I forgot to take a picture, but the thing about pictures of casserole is that they just look like dishes with cheese on top, so here's a picture of Dexter wrapped in Matt's apron:

As always, love and best fishes!  Mwah!

Saucy Salmon Burgers (and other good things to do with frozen fish)!

Hola, my sweet Butterballs!
Long time no food :(  Just so you know you weren't neglected intentionally, here's a brief summary of mine and Matt's last two months:

-Bought a house! (Yay!)
-Moved into the new house! (Yay!)
-Had a spring concert! (Yay!)
-New pipes exploded because they were too full of tree roots. (Boo...)
-Matt got his big kid job! (Yay!)
-Matt graduated with his Masters degree in Media Arts! (Yay!)
-Former neighbor at the rental went postal and weed whacked all of Matt's rosebushes, in addition to verbally threatening us and our landlady resulting in police reports... (Boo...)

 

All of this took place within two weeks.  In addition, we made the executive (and ultimately incredibly stupid...) decision to switch Butters to the fancy protein food that was supposed to make him a kitty cat super model.  The subsequent result was really just alot of cat poo and bleach.  Also, Butters gained three pounds.  So naturally we put him back on the fat cat food, and all of us are much happier.

You can certainly imagine that not a lot of cooking happened during this period of time.  I made roughly 7 lbs of guacamole for Matt's graduation party, but that's really about it.  I went to a conference last week for five days, and Matt officially used our new stove for the first time.  It's been rough I tell ya.  We went grocery shopping for the first time in three months the other day.  You know it's bad when you have to buy things that are usually just in the cabinet (read: salt and flour).  $500 later (shudder), our kitchen has food in it, and we even have vegetables!  Another semi-entertaining obstacle was learning how to use our first gas stove...  I may or may not have lit a pasta scoop on fire.

I am super fortunate to be able to just hang out in the summertime.  Obviously I could go back to the Huck or something of the like during the summer, but to be quite frank, this is the only chance I get to get anything accomplished during the year (i.e. keeping up with you fine people, laundry, drinking wine, you know, real basic life necessities...).  I've cooked more in the last two weeks than I have in the last two months, which makes everyone happier.  The result of this is lots and lots of new recipes!   

You may notice that I am using frozen salmon fillets.  You may feel welcome as always to use fresh salmon.  As a quick weeknight dinner, I usually like to have a bag of frozen salmon in the freezer (for pasta, burgers, salads, etc.).  They contain no additional ingredients, and they are quite a bit cheaper (especially if you need to keep it in the freezer to cook at your leisure).  Also, this recipe makes about six burgers, so if you're on a budget, it's important to consider volume, and these burgers only cost about $2.00 per serving (including sauce, garnish and buns), which is pretty impressive considering they're made out of something other than beef.

To make my saucy salmon burgers you will need:

For the Burgers:

about 1 1/2 lbs of salmon (I use frozen)

3/4 cup bread crumbs (if your mixture doesn't seem to be sticking together, you can certainly add more!)

1/2 red onion, finely minced

1/4 cup red pepper, finely minced

2 tbsp olive oil mayonaise

2 eggs

1 tsp dill

1 tbsp parsley

1 tsp or more if you like sriracha 

salt and pepper to taste

Thaw salmon (de-bone and remove skin if it hasn't been already), and pull apart until the meat appears minced.  Add in the rest of your ingredients and mix with hands until well combined.  Form into six equal patties (but don't mush them flat, they should be about an inch thick prior to cooking).  Heat about 3 tbsp of olive oil in a pan on medium to medium high (a grill pan works well too!), cook on each side until browned, flipping once.  If you want them more well-done (read: drier), you can finish them in the oven at 350 degrees for about five minutes. Otherwise, just heat your oven to warm to keep them ready to eat as you finish cooking all of the patties.  

While your patties are in the oven on warm, you can make this tasty tzatziki sauce to put on top.  Truthfully, on any given week night I might cheat and use Costco's organic tzatziki sauce, but if I have the time, this is the recipe I like to use.

You will need:

1 1/2 cup sour cream or unsweetened Greek yogurt

3 tbsp grated cucumber

2 tsp chopped garlic (finely)

1 tbsp chopped dill (fresh is best!)

2 tsp lemon juice

salt and pepper to taste

Combine all ingredients in a bowl, don't over stir.  If you want a thicker spread as opposed to a sauce, use 3/4 cream cheese and 3/4 sour cream or yogurt instead of 1 1/2 cup sour cream or yogurt.

To assemble:

Matt and I like thinly sliced tomato and cucumber for garnish and toasted hoagie rolls (cut into two, smaller burger sized buns).  I like to toast the buns in the same pans I used for the burgers with a little extra olive oil.  For an extra "zip", you can rub the toasted part of the bun with a clove of garlic.  Spread your tzatziki on both sides of your bun, add burger and chosen garnishes.  Most of the time we serve these with chips and salsa, or guacamole (which is also a tasty substitute for the tzatziki sauce!).

Cheers, my dear sweet Butterballs, to a productive and tasty summer!  As, always, love and best fishes!  May your bellies, be full, your faces be pleasantly sunburned, your glasses be full, and your homes be blessed.  Happy cooking!

Tis the Season for Peachy "Quin" Jambalaya!!!!!

Howdy Butterballs!
Long time no eat!  Turns out that teaching keeps you a little bit busy, but don't feel singled out!  Not only have I not cooked for you in months, I haven't cooked for the husband or myself either.  When you spend all your time at work or passed out in exhaustion on the couch, you cook things like spaghetti sauce, tacos, spaghetti sauce, or McDonald's.  The beauty of all of these things is that they all pair beautifully with cheap red wine.  This laziness also has a tendency to bleed over into weekend days.  I find that if I can't put it in the Crockpot with wine, garlic and an onion and expect reasonably tasty results, I will make Papa John's (which would not be so bad, except I would rather pay the $3 delivery fee than walk the block and a half from my house to their storefront to pick it up). 

With the holiday season upon us, music teachers find themselves faced with an additional seasonal task of preparing and executing the annual holiday program.  As this is the very first program I will be preparing entirely on my own, I find myself flying into a logistical obstacle course.  I am so lucky to have the amazing students that I do.  They are enthusiastic, adorable and eager to show off their seasoned woodblock skills, and I am already exhausted and we are still 10 days out.  The lack of cooking going on in my house has also resulted in a complete lack of left-overs for lunching purposes.  Luckily my room has a closet that I keep filled to the brim with goldfish crackers, fruit and bags of popcorn, or I would probably be SOL, and no, not a needle pulling thread (Ha!  10 points for a superfluous Sound of Music joke... anyone?).  I recently came to the conclusion that this will probably not improve anytime soon, so I made the addition of dried fruit, little baby hummus cups from Costco and these super fancy quinoa chips!  Hopefully this will prevent me from developing rickets. 

In the spirit of this busy holiday season, I bring you good tidings of all things spicy.  As we go deeper into the wrapping paper, plastic tree and cookie abyss, I find that one more hearty stew or pot roast will likely push me over the edge.  I love a good bourguignon as much as the next American, but I also find more and more everyday that cooking with wine is nice, but makes me wish there was more wine left for me when I am finished (greedy, greedy beef shank...).  This fact coupled with the feeling of deep and utter dread I felt upon coming home faced with the prospect of yet another dinner made out of some nondescript animal's "burger" sparked within me a rebellious revolution.  So naturally, I turned to burger's sassy porcine cousin, sausage!  I also was fortunate enough to have in my possession, one bag of frozen jumbo shrimp.  Pasta was out, so I settled on our Costco tub of quinoa.  Even I was surprised with how good this turned out, considering that I had no vegetables to speak of and was feeling selfish about my cooking "liquid".

To make my faux jambalaya you will need:
1 lb fresh or frozen shrimp, jumbo works best (if you choose frozen, allow extra reducing time for the extra water the ice will add to your sauce)
1 lb pork sausage
1 small onion
1 12 oz can diced tomatoes (I prefer no salt added)
3 tablespoons tomato paste
1/4 cup dry red wine (yep, I thought the sausage looked thirsty too...)
2 12 oz cans of chicken stock
1 cup (dry) plain quinoa (DO NOT use the kind that is pre-seasoned, this is a mistake I have made and hope never to repeat...)
2 cups fresh spinach
Chili flakes to taste (about 1 teaspoon will give you a medium-spicy result)
1/4 teaspoon chili powder
1/2 teaspoon cumin
1/2 teaspoon coriander
1 tablespoon dried parsley
cracked black pepper and salt to taste

For the quinoa:
Heat 2 tablespoons-ish of olive oil in the bottom of a medium sauce pan.  Finely chop your smalll onion.  On medium-high heat brown onion, and add quinoa to toast it.  Once your quinoa is golden brown, add one can of chicken stock. Cover and let liquid absorb.  Repeat process with more stock until quinoa is tender.  Season lightly with salt, pepper, and cumin (to taste, not the 1/2 tsp. listed above).  Add in a handful of spinach at a time, allow the previous handful to wilt before adding another.  Cover and keep on warm until your shrimp and sausage mixture is done.

For the jambalaya:
In a separate pan, brown sausage, adding chili flake and powder to taste.  Add in tomatoes, tomato paste, cumin, celery, coriander, and roughly a half a can of stock, and red wine.  Add in shrimp (if raw, allow them to cook in sauce until pink and sauce is reduced, if frozen allow to cook in sauce until it is nicely reduced, and dare I say it, roughly the thickness of spaghetti sauce).  Once reduced, salt and pepper to taste, and fold into quinoa.

Here's to variety most certainly being the spice of life!  This time of year, allow yourself to reflect on what really matters most.  Whether it's your fat cat, your loving family, a warm home, enthusiastic students, great co-workers, good friends or fine wine, find what makes you happiest and celebrate it!  True thankfulness for what we have is the best gift we can give ourselves.

As always, happy cooking, happier eating, love and best fishes, Butterballs!  May Santa find your bellies full, glasses empty, and pants delightfully too tight!  Mwah!