-41 with the Wind Chill Means Hot and Sour Soup, Y'all!!!

Butterballs, butterballs,
The forecast today calls for a major wind chill warning, and I quote, "Long term exposure can result in hypothermia, frost bite, or DEATH."  Cheery, no?  That last part is my favorite.  What that means for us is no time outside, and my tolerance for getting in and out of the car is at an all time low.  THAT means, I had to get gas for carpool, so that used up my "getting out of the car" quotient for the day, so that means, Refrigerator Roulette!  Here's a rough summary of Matt and my week night thought process:

Matt: The new Bon Appetit came yesterday!

Katie: Oooooooo, what's on the cover?

Matt:  Fancy chicken and dumplings!  With mushrooms!

Katie:  Oohhhhh, we have mushrooms!

Matt:  We could make this!

Katie:  Okay, I'll thaw some chicken!

Matt:......reading

Katie:  *Googling hot and sour soup because the cover photo looked more like hot and sour soup than chicken and dumplings*

Matt:  This takes two and a half hours and you have to own a pressure cooker.  Also what's a morel?

Katie:  That's okay, I'm already making hot and sour soup!  Also, I'm not thawing chicken, because I will probably eat all the left over pizza while our shitty microwave takes ten hours to thaw all the chicken. 

So the long and the short of it is that we made hot and sour soup with left over breakfast sausage. 

Hot and sour soup is something that you only buy the morning after one too many 7 and 7's in a Chinese restaurant (you can infer the kind of Chinese restaurant by the fact that this story takes place in the morning...), and you only have $15 in your bank account (i.e. college).  It is full of meat, egg, mushrooms, and grease, and can usually be purchased in near-gallon-drum quantities for a little less than dirt cheap.  While this does not aptly describe our circumstances this evening, since we haven't been 21 now for several years (read: I drink a glass of wine, make some sort of creation for dinner, and fall asleep watching Dr. Quinn in bed at 9 p.m. nearly every day), and we have to get up in the morning for silly things like work, and feeding the fur babies, and drinking coffee, this turned out particularly well.   I also didn't use any of the recipes I found, since most of them required things like tofu, so here's how to make my faux hot and sour soup!

To make my week night savior Hot and Sour Soup you will need:
 1/2 pound shitake mushrooms sliced
6 mini bell peppers, for color, sliced in little rings
1 head broccoli, chopped 
1 small onion halved and sliced
1 tablespoon minced garlic
3 green onions, chopped
a few tablespoons olive oil
3/4 lb. browned sausage (or any kind of protein, chicken or pork would also be great, Matt usually doesn't define a dish as dinner unless it contains animal)
4 eggs, lightly whisked
2 cans (4 cups) Chicken stock
2 cups water
1/2 cup white wine
5 tbsp corn starch
3 tbsp sriracha
1 tsp chili flakes, or to taste
1/4 cup white vinegar
3 tbsp. soy sauce (I always use low sodium)

Brown the onion, garlic, broccoli, mushrooms and peppers in olive oil in a large stock pot.  Add in the sausage, stock, water, wine, sriracha, chili flake, soy sauce, and vinegar.  Bring to a boil, add in the corn starch, simmer for 15 minutes to thicken.  Bring the heat down to medium, drizzle the egg into the hot soup, stir lightly.  Stir in the green onion.  Serve with egg rolls (which I did not, in fact, have.  If it were payday, I would serve this with egg rolls...).  Although the picture might suggest otherwise, you should not share this with the furry children.  Unless you are fond of cleaning spicy, spicy carpet stains. 

Enjoy, because it's mighty cold out there, friends.  Remember, don't prolongedly expose yourself, because of that whole "death" thing.  Really it makes far more sense to make yourself some soup and drink a glass of whatever.  As always, love and best fishes!

Better than the Box Stroganoff!

Butterballs!  My dear, sweet, Butterballs!
Happy 2014!  I've missed you so!  We really must catch up.  Since we last chatted we, of all things, acquired a dog!  Butters needed a BFF, so we adopted a really cranky, adorable Brussels Griffon named Dexter!  He's the best, we haven't had to mop since he's been here because that guy is SUPER good at licking the floor!  He and Butters were insta-brothers, and they love each other very much. He crawled his stinky, stinky way into our hearts, and ate all of our food and our cat poop. 

We have actually been cooking a whole bunch, regardless of what this blog would indicate.  This is actually a good thing, because it means that I have a wealth of recipes just waiting to be penned to paper!  Or typed to interweb, whatever. 

Something that happens a whole bunch when you have a cheap ass microwave is that when you thaw meat, it cooks it on the ends, and stays a meat-cicle in the middle, so the natural course of action is to turn it into little meat strips and make stroganoff.  Stroganoff is what the Russians made when their cream would get sour, and their microwaves screwed up the steak their fathers-in-law gave them, and dill was all they had in their специй's - for those of you who are reading from Mother Russia, you know that I Google translated "spice rack"!  That's "spetsiy" for those of us who are not doing that, but might be drinking Chianti, watching New Girl, using Google Translate and blogging while they fight off a cold and their husband's work in the basement. 

This came about one night while I was mulling over a box of Hamburger Helper (read: DON'T).  I was thawing some steak to turn it into Steakburger Helper, when all of a sudden it turned into already cooked eraser meat (so... this sounds disgusting, I promise I'm getting to the good part...).  Then I also discovered that Hamburger Helper is crap, and if I was going through all this trouble to thaw something, I just as well make something good, because did you know that you have to "simmer meat with contents of flavor packet" for like, 45 minutes?  You can make some seriously good shit in 45 minutes.  So I cut up literally 3 lbs of sirloin that was a silicon breast implant on one end and cryogenically frozen on the other and made some tasty ass stroganoff.

You will need:
2 lbs or more (depending on how anemic you are that day) sirloin or other choice of beef meat cut into strips on the bias
1 onion, sliced into strips
2 cups sliced mushrooms
1 and 1/2 cup sour cream (you can also use milk, but you'll have to reduce more)
4 tbsp rice wine vinegar
2 tsp dill
1 and 1/2 cup stock of some variety, I used chicken
salt and pepper to taste 
some variety of flat noodles, I used whole wheat egg noodles

Start by browning onions and mushrooms in a couple of tablespoons of olive oil.  Reserve in a bowl.  Add meat to pan, cook through, add in vinegar, cook until evaporated (for tenderness).  Add in onions and mushrooms, add COLD stock to pan (room temp at the warmest), stir in sour cream, this will keep it from curdling.  Stir in completely (you could also do this before adding both the stock and the cream to the pan).  Add in dill, salt and pepper, reduce over medium-high heat until creamy (you can add in some thickening flour like Wondra to speed up the process).  Serve over noodles.  This whole process takes about 20 minutes. 

We served it with roasted asparagus and red wine.  Because everything in the world except for maybe white wine goes with red wine, and I'm certain that's debatable.

In closing Butterballs, may your New Years Resolutions be more like guidelines, may you be ever grateful for and proud of what you've already achieved, and may your bellies and hearts be full to bursting of whatever makes you happiest!  Here's to more food, less worries, more kitty and puppy kisses, and less "flavor packets".  Much love and best dishes!  Mwah!